Welcome back to the worst fantasy football team you are likely to ever come across. Gameweek 9 saw no FPL transfers being made, as my squad didn’t have many internationals so they all enjoyed a KFC instead. This tasty treat worked wonders as they all put in a distinctly lower than average performance in gameweek 9. With a Fantasy Premier League score of 25 which was less than half the weekly average my rank is now a staggering 3,220,124 putting the collection of crappers in the bottom 9%. Still a long way to go to reach that bottom percentile…
Goalkeeper
Schmeichel – Conceded 2 goals, but stopped 3 so ended up with a reasonable 2 points.
Defenders
Bassong – Should have captained this guy as he conceded 6 goals putting him on minus 1!
Pieters – The bad boy of the class came back with a clean sheet, although he kind of made up for it with a yellow card and no sign of bonus points!
van Aanholt – It was a no show from Patrick so Danny Graham came in altering the formation to a 4-4-2!
Huth – A lonely point meant the Leicester duo brought home 3 in total.
Captain Cook – His boat took an absolute battering at City and barely made it back to the South Coast, zero doubled is zero!
Midfielders
Cattermole – Back to his best after a well earned rest in gameweek 6, saw his standard 2 points.
King – Didn’t feature in gameweek 9 however, Colback, back from injury brought back 2 points.
Coquelin – The third of the trio of C’s escaped with 3 points. It was a shame that none of the bad boy C’s picked up a yellow card!
Shit Sanchez – Didn’t play again and no sub was available, he’s on monitor…
Strikers
Ayoze – Yet again, the young Spaniard let me down with a goal and assist, he’s out!
Graham – Came on as sub in the Shithouse XI and for Sunderland he attributed 1 point to the total.
So here is the line-up for gameweek 10 and you will see I have taken a massive gamble bringing England’s ‘best’ goal scorer into the fray. We’ll see what a load of shit that statement is! Bring it!
Transfers
Ayoze (OUT) -> Rooney (IN)
Pieters (OUT) -> Hutton (IN)
Captain – Going for Bassong, hoping his form continues.
Good Luck everyone!
By Matty Kaye
