This Fantasy Premier Leagye season the rules are exactly the same for the Shithouse XI and for those not familiar with this feature I will outline them below:
1. Where possible all players must register FPL minutes (60+) with their clubs each gameweek
2. No hits can be taken
3. All chips must be used (All out Attack, Bench Boost and Triple Captain)
4. Wildcards are optional
5. If a player is suspended, it doesn’t count to an absentee
Last week I created my initial draft of dingbats who I thought would bring most fantasy managers misery and sleepless nights. This week saw a few changes in personel, but we are now 100% happy with this squad of players, for the wrong reason…
Jakupovic (4.0m) & Gomes (5.0m) – I have decided on a 4.5m keeper rotation that provides an awful first 7 games. Jakupovic of Hull and Gomes of Watford make this run of an opening mess; Leicester City (H), Chelsea (H), Manchester United (H), West Ham (A), Arsenal (H), Liverpool (A), Chelsea (H)!
Robertson (4.5m) – He plays for a Hull City team that are falling apart with injuries!
Francis (4.5m) – He can be a bit of a handful at times but Bournemouth have some tough games where he can be utilised!
Djilobodji (4.5m) – Its always great to have a player who no one can pronounce, so they don’t come much better than DidgyBodyJi!
Lowton (4.5m) – Burnley will be strong at the back, but Lowton has some tough games muddled inbetween so he will be used here.
Kabasele (5.0m) – Watford were strong last year, but that ship may have sailed and their new voyage will be a relegation scrap, so in comes the new addition to that squad
Gueye (£5.0m) – 10 Yellow Cards last season for relegated Villa, why wasn’t he in my Shithouse XI team back then?
Yacob (4.5m) – A late addition last season and he was instrumental in our demise, so he gets another chance. Also Yacob managed 9 yellow cards last season, which bodes well!
Cattermole (4.5m) – A Shithouse XI legend, he is our hero. 8 yellow cards last season, which was below average for him!
Barry (4.5m) – Only 5 yellow cards for Barry last season, but at the end of the day he is a bit poor so he features.
Dier (5.5m) – Some might be shocked at this addition, but listed as a midfielder this season, he won’t reign in those clean sheet points. He received 10 yellow cards last season, the most of anyone!
Yellow Card Tally for the 2015/16 Season for the shithouse XI midfielders: 42!
Diomande (4.5m) – He plays for Hull, a diamond in the rough? Probably a turd in the rough! Perfect for us.
Vokes (6.0m) – I don’t expect Burnley to score many and Vokes plays second fiddle to Gray so seems a great fit.
Borini (5.5m) – Borini is on monitor but I expect him to lose out to Defoe and even Watmore will come off the bench to secure solitary points!
Good Luck and save those reds for me!
Written by Matty Kaye