S**THOUSE XI – Gameweek 34 FPL Tips – Fantasy Premier League Tips

The dream continues here at S**thouse HQ as my reds continue coming in. Wildcard was the order last gameweek and I felt I used it wisely, all with one exception of that S**THOUSE, Steve Cook. He has hurt me so many times this season so why the hell did I include him in my Wildcard squad! His fixtures are not too great in coming weeks so I guess I’m stuck with him. Anyway, onto the rank… A 6k jump has landed me ever closer to that 3.5m mark with a finishing rank of 3,499,587. The way I see it, whilst we’re on a roll let’s throw the dice, so bench boost is activated. That’s right, 15 so called athletes will take to the field for a much needed last push to doom!



Total gameweek 33 points – 30

Average FPL points – 56


Guzan – A point from the Villa keeper kept my score very honest, well done Bradley.


Kaboul – 3 points from the Sunderland centre back which is an odd score for a defender. He somehow managed 2 bonus points yet conceded 2 goals. Explain?

Steven Taylor – Injured after conceding 2 goals equals sweet FA for the Geordie.

Captain Wollscheid – I bought Wally for him to be a wally. A wally he was which means our captain scores zero! What a wally.

Lescott – Like his keeper Brad, Lescott returned his usual 1 point score!

Cook – Again! He does this! Why did I buy him… again!

Total defensive points – 15


Cattermole – 2 points from Lee is completely acceptable!

Cork – New boy comes in with a maiden score of 3. I’ll let that slide… this time.

Coquelin – 1 minute away from halving his points as he completes 60 minutes and then gets subbed.

Wanyama – What the… Wanyama, you scored on his debut, you dingbat.


Ulloa – Can always rely on Ulloa to play a portion of the game and bring home a single. Top job.

Now onto this week’s team:


This week I have got rid of Agbonlahor as his own manager admitted he wasn’t fit enough to play Premier League Football! That’s why I bought him!

Transfer – Agbonlahor > Gomis

Captain – Steven Taylor

Chips Used – Bench boost

Good luck all and keep those reds for me!

Written by Matty Kaye


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