Shithouse XI – Game-Week 1

So here we are, 3 days away from the kick-off of the Barclays Premier League. As you may have seen, 1 of our 3 teams we are running this year is called the SHITHOUSE XI. This right here is our team re-drafted for game-week 1. If you haven’t read the original draft of our team, please do so here to get a justification for each player’s presence within the squad.

Here is our game-week 1 SHITHOUSE XI team:


Demichelis – He is a doubt for the opening game as he is lacking match fitness.

Cole – The player has picked up a thigh injury so he is a doubt for the opening weekend.

Tiote – He is struggling with a hamstring injury and is a doubt, with an unknown return date.

For a full list of currently injured players, head over to our injury table.

Amat – The young Spaniard played in 17 games for Swansea last season, averaging 73 minutes. With Chico Flores gone, Jordi Amat looks most likely to step into his place based on last season’s play time stats, which should increase. In those 17 games, Swansea conceded 21 goals whilst Amat was on the pitch and he was only awarded clean sheet points for one match… Yes, one! He picked up no bonus points throughout the season and 3 yellow cards. His points tally came to 26, a below-par 1.5 points on average per match. This has resulted in him being awarded our last minute draft-in for Demichelis. Welcome to the SHITHOUSE XI Jordi!

Wanyama – Last season was his first in the Premier League, completing 23 games for the Saints. He averaged 72 minutes of play time in those games, scoring and assisting no goals and picking up 7 yellow cards throughout. Return on investment if you had this player? 42. That is less than the 2 points you get for the player completing 60 minutes. Having said this, he needs to step up this season after the “clear-out” of Southampton’s top players.

Jedinak– I regret to put this player in because I actually quite like Palace and their players but despite his points tally of 95 for last season, let’s break down how he actually achieved it. The man played in every minute of every game last season except for the last 1, just falling short of the 60 minute mark as he was subbed off injured on the 59th minute (ouch). That right there is 75 points. As a midfielder, he gained a clean sheet point for, as you guessed it, every clean sheet managed. 12 clean sheets later we are on 87. 4 bonus points, a single goal and 2 assists gives us 15 points. The resulting 102 minus the 7 yellow cards means 95 points. For a player that has played 89 minutes of each match on average, you would usually be expecting a post 100 points tally. Sorry Mile, but you are starting in our SHITHOUSE squad.

Be sure to check back next Wednesday for an analysis of how the SHITHOUSE XI did and to see what changes we are making for game-week 2! Enjoy the opening weekend and tweet us with any suggestions you may have for the squad at @Fpl_Updates.

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